I keep saying it but I'm running on E. I have a brick in my seat, had it all day with no time to spare. I wanted something to hand out but the slips shrunk to the point where they wouldn't cut. Pain aint got nuttin to do wit it. I'm not crying about good byes because I'm not leaving. I still have shit up my ass. I have more award ceremonies to worry about. I have to deliver undeliverable packages. Plus on top of that I have to help plan/try to be of some use planning a retreat that no one wants to attend. Something that I have Lost hope for. Wheres my passion? where is this light that I'm asking for. I'll zombie it till I get to study for classes that I can only hope to Be. I have grown yes farther from my friends and family. stressed my pants off to be by myself. I wish someone would grab my hand by force who give me comfort. Slap my face and tell me just to do my shit and let it go. Just quit it all and run away. But I cannot. I must stay strong! Pick and stick is something I said years ago and it fed me well. I must break down barriers and shout in the face of progress. Lets move this on. My mind thinks of collective thoughts and empathy. Lets get this moving with a new dream, not a continued lets put forth someone else's dreams. I want to push for national recognition. Lets move. I could just let my self do everything last minute. it will get done and I will be rushed through everything with my body taking all the tough punching bag rap. I strangle the sun with my eyes everyday when I rest them to the birds song. Too early too late in my day rest myself with no body movement. The free glum that comes with banquets start to catch up with my body. I need that weight lifted off my flesh. Yes society you tell me this but It is what makes me happy and gives me back my confidence. Emotion needs lift and the run releases the anger. The pressure needs relief and it will leave with the beans. Unproductive seems to be a synonym with lateness that rhymes with me. I was early to late rhymes with masturbate. Thats life that everyone sees. So don't tell me that someone runs my life and give me things to do that prepare me for my future. I do to learn for my self to build my confidence to build up to a building of a masterpiece that is my hard work. It is my reason for life. The thing I start, the thing I create. Myself. It's not ego, its my life. I live to live for the experience. I will experience your life if you let me. I just need the confidence to do so.

Your Fogar,
Craig